I moved into my house four months ago and after weeks of unpacking and rearranging, I had everything setup and the poodles and I were settled. Or, so I thought. The only thing left to do was to hang my pictures, right? WRONG! Why was it taking so long to hang a few pictures? Maybe because something didn’t feel right. What? I had no idea. Well, not until I looked at the stack of books teetering atop my desk and the ones on the floor and the ones in boxes which I had yet to unpack. There was no room. Despite my theory that books multiply in the dark when no one was looking (still not giving up on that theory), the reality was, I’d bought more books. The books that fit on the bookshelves a year ago and no longer fit hadn’t gotten bigger, they weren’t retaining water and taking up more space on the shelves. Nope, it was time for me to be honest and admit the truth. I’d bought more books…a lot more books (don’t judge). Okay, so now, that I have more books, I need more bookshelves. Unfortunately, the small bedroom I’d converted into my office couldn’t support more bookshelves, and still have room for pictures and dog beds and…well, you get the picture. That’s when I got the bright idea. I should swap the guest bedroom and the office. The guest bedroom was larger and had plenty of space for bookshelves and even had a big comfy sofa for….working and contemplating new mysteries. Swapping the furniture in two rooms, how hard could it be? I could get those furniture sliders I’d seen on an infomercial and it would be a piece of cake. I had a long four day weekend ahead. So, in between edits (which I hate), I would move furniture. What could possibly go wrong?
The first day of the long weekend, I tried the furniture sliders (which work well, by the way) and started moving my desk, a mammoth traditional-style wooden beast with ball and claw feet. I got the sliders underneath and slid the monster to the door. That was when I hit my first obstacle. My desk was too long to make the 90 degree turn out of the room without getting tilted on its side (even after I removed the door). I considered hiring movers, but at $125 per hour with a one hour minimum, I decided against it. I decided to give my brain a rest and read (Libby Klein’s Class Reunions Are Murder was a good distraction and a great book – I’ll have to do a book review).
Day two I awoke with a renewed determination. I was woman, hear me roar. I could tilt that desk by myself. The first snap occurred fairly early in the process. The second snap didn’t occur until I was sliding the beast into its new home. Two out of four of the ball and claw legs were broken. I needed fortification. So, I went to breakfast and contemplated desks over bacon and eggs and coffee. What solution did I come to? The desk wasn’t a work of art. It wasn’t an antique and now I had an excuse to get a new desk. It was a piece of furniture, not the Mona Lisa. Besides, I was ready to move onto a new style anyway. I’d glue those legs back on and eventually get a new desk. Decision made, I headed home to continue my move. Next, I needed to get the daybed moved. Sliders in place, I got the daybed to the door of the guest room before I realized it wouldn’t fit without getting tilted. I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking I tilted the daybed and broke it. Well, you’re wrong. I called the movers. Unfortunately, they couldn’t come until Wednesday. That was far too late. This was a Labor Day Weekend project. Surely, I could tilt the daybed by myself. And, I did. I got the daybed on its back without any snaps or breaks. Unfortunately, I miscalculated the legs of the daybed and it ended up wedged in the doorway. Try as I might, I couldn’t get the bed through the doorway. This problem was bigger than bacon and coffee. It took lemon blueberry scones to fix this. But, I didn’t have blueberries. Fortunately, I live just a few blocks from a grocery store. At the grocery store, I figured, why not get all of my groceries and save myself a trip. My scone recipe requires a pastry cutter and my zester has lost some of its zest. So, a quick trip to another store and I was set (pastry cutter, zester, lemon curd and a juicer because….who doesn’t need a new juicer and its lime green too). Back home, I made scones. 
The daybed was still wedged in the doorway, but the house smelled wonderful and while the scones didn’t look like the picture (how do you keep from bursting blueberries and turning everything blue), they were tasty. Fortified with lemon blueberry scones, lemon curd (the lemony stuff from lemon meringue pie) and clotted cream, I decided to finish my edits and tackle the daybed dilemma another day.
Day three, I killed a spider. I don’t do bugs, spiders, rodents, reptiles or anything that looks like any of those things. So, I went to church and prayed for guidance. Then, I went to the store and bought spider spray and a shoe rack (can’t have anything on the floor that spiders might crawl into). I assembled the shoe rack and placed every pair of shoes I own (including flip flops) in its nice new spider proof home, ate more scones and finished my edits. I wrestled the daybed back into the guest room (soon to be office) and contemplated its future. Contemplation takes a lot out of you, so I replenished my strength with corn chowder (bacon, shrimp and corn chowder actually). I reminded myself I still have one more day and decided to spend the remainder of the day watching British cozies.
My fourth and final day of the four day Labor Day Project From Hell I decided life (and my holiday weekend) were both too short to spend wrestling a day bed and bookshelves. So, I watched the Murder, She Wrote marathon on the Hallmark Channel and read Hercule Poirot short stories (purely for research purposes, of course). Then, I made Chilli lime Chicken Tacos, grilled pineapple salsa, roasted corn with chipotle honey lime butter and blackberry lemonade. It was delicious. 
Tomorrow, I’ll call professionals who have the time, muscle and patience to swap the furniture. I’ll call an exterminator because…well, spiders (it was a very big spider), and I’ll go back to work well rested from my labors and well fed.